Quote of the Day

"I have you on speed dial." -- Words from my Dept. Chair this morning. I don't know whether to take it as an ominous warning or a genuine compliment. (1/26/11)

Quote of the Day

"You know our sub for 1st period? She had the biggest pit stains!" -- Normally I ignore these little overshares from my students, but now I'm curious who was sweating so much from that early in the morning. (2/24/11)

Quote of the Day

"Look, you can see her criticals." -- A student's exclamation after her friend's fingernails were momentarily projected on the screen. (2/24/11)

Quote of the Day

"I know how you feel. I never went to the dentist for almost 15 years." -- Confession from my dentist's receptionist after I admitted how nervous I was to come in for an appointment. She later cautioned me not to follow her example since she ended up going to the dentist every weekend for a couple of months to get work done (2/23/11)

Quote of the Day

"You're so stupid. It's because  they're not in the Hawaiian alphabet." -- A student's condescending repetition to her friends of the lame reason I concocted so she would stop asking me silly questions like why there was an A-Building and a Z-Building on campus but no C-Building or X-Building. (I know,I know. I'm horrible)  (2/22/11)

Quote of the Day

"Aw. I went the wrong way." -- I hiker who had a sackful of ti leaves that  I met on the Hauula Loop Trail. He had asked me if I had seen the rest of his group; too bad the rest of his ti leaf gathering party was on the Maakua Ridge Trail (2/21/11)

Quote of the Day

"There's only one thing I put 'Strongly Disagree'." -- A student's confession after taking his school quality survey. The statement in question: I enjoy coming to school. (2/16/11)

Question of the Day

"Do you make this spaghetti or does it come from a can?" -- A coworker's borderline insulting question to/attempt at making small talk with one of the lunch ladies at the cafeteria. (2/17/11)

(just look at it...he's kind of got a point)

Quote of the Day

"You're so short." -- From a 4'9" 7th grader when she saw me next to one of her classmates who is already almost as tall as me. (2/16/11)

Quote of the Day

"I'm a man!" -- A 3 year old girl in the doctor's office waiting room sporting a fake mustache. (2/14/11)

Hyperbole of the Day

"This is the worst Valentine's Day ever!" -- One of my 7th graders who apparently didn't receive a single treat from her peers. I felt sorry for her and shared a candy that I had in my drawer which brought a huge smile to her face. Moments later I saw her spitting it out saying how disgusting it was. So much for gratitude. (2/14/11)

Quote of the Day

"Look Mister, the ricola from yesterday is still there." -- One student's observation about the fallen cough drop from the day before that was never cleaned up. I don't know what's worse, the fact that the cough drop was slowly melting in this heat and wasn't properly disposed of OR the reaction from two other students who started chanting "rrriiiicccccooollllaaa" in the middle of class.  (2/11/11)

Quote of the Day

"It certainly looks like you haven't been starving." -- Condescending observation from my not-so-favorite neighbor after she asked me how I was doing living on my own. (2/9/11)

Quote of the Day

"And Daniel is just chopped liver." -- A friend's graceful light-hearted save after a coworker praised two other teachers in the room while only omitting me. (1/20/11)

Quote of the Day

"Ooh! I love David Busters!" -- One student's reaction after she found out my brother's name was David. (2/4/11)

Quote of the Day

"Does she ever talk about me?" -- A lovelorn 8th grader asking me for any signs that the girl he's stalking likes him. (2/1/11)

Quote of the Day

"Oh, I thought it might be a tumor." -- A 7th grade student after I asked him why he interrupted today's lesson to ask me what that lump was on my leg. It was my keys in my pocket. (2/2/11)

Quote of the Day

"I concur wholehardedly." -- Part of a coworker's message sent via email to the entire faculty. Its collled spel chek peopol! :P (2/1/11)