Me [to the class]: "This morning, when I pulled into work, I could hear someone yelling at me. I look up and see Student 1 yelling at me and it's not even 7:30."
Student 1 [in a loud voice]: "Wow! I wasn't even yelling."
Student 2: "Were your windows down?"
Me: "No. My windows were up. My engine was running. I even had some music playing and I could still hear Student 1 yelling."
Student 1 [even louder]: "I wasn't even yelling!"
Student 3: "Yeah, Student 1's normal voice is yelling." (1/19/23)
Student 1: "I swear [teacher name] only gives you an A if you either have red hair or if you know their family."
Me: "If that's what you think, there's only one solution."
Student 1: "What's that?"
Me: "Dye your hair red."
Student 1: "But that wouldn't work. They already know this is my natural hair color."
Me [shaking my head]: "No, all you have to do is tell them..."
Student 2 [smiling as she knows what I'm about to say and finishes my sentence]: "All you have to do is tell them you've been dying your hair all this time and now your hair is read because you finally stopped." (1/17/24)
Student 1: "Mister, it's so cold today."
Student 2: "Yeah. It was so cold even this morning."
Student 1: "Yeah. It was so cold my lips were purple and my hands were going numb." (1/12/24)
Student 1 [seeing an older picture of me]: "Whoa, Mister! You had hair?"
Student 2: "Where?"
Student 1: "Up there on the board."
Student 2: "Whoa. I was not mentally prepared to see that." (1/11/23)
Student: "What does your dog do when you're not at home?"
Me: "I give her all your homework, and she just chews it up to shreds."
Student: "No, but really."
Me: "I don't know. She just waits for me to come back."
Student: "So nobody watches her? Like you don't have your mom come and watch her while you're gone?" (1/10/24)
