Quote of the Day (greetings)

Student: "Oh, Mister! somebody who knows you told me to tell you 'hi'."
Me: "Who?"
Student: "I don't know who she was, but she was old."
(11/30/16)

Quote of the Day (kids)

A few months ago, the following student expressed her desire to become a teacher after she graduates from college.
Student: "Mister, are you ever going to have kids?"
Me: "That's an extremely personal question."
Student: "You're right. Sorry."
[moments later]
Student: "Are you not going to answer my question?"
Me: "No. Why do you want to know anyway?"
Student: "Because, I want to know if I'll be able to teach your kids someday."
(11/29/16)

Quote of the Day (dream)

Student: "Mister, I had a dream about you over the break."
Me (obviously intrigued): "Oh? What was it about?"
Student: "It was horrible."
Me (bracing for the worst): "Uh oh. What was wrong?"
Student: "I dreamt that you didn't have a lesson prepared for us like you usually do."
Me (relieved): "That is horrible. That's my nightmare."
Student: "It was so boring. All we did was just sit around and do nothing."
(11/28/16)

Quote of the Day (taco bell)

Student with an infamous affection for Taco Bell begins zoning out during her assignment right before lunch.
Me: "Do you need help? Are you OK?"
Student: "No. I'm just thinking about Taco Bell."
Me: "When are you NOT thinking about Taco Bell?"
Student: "When I'm thinking about McDonald's"
(11/23/16)

Quote of the Day (bag)

Student: "Mister, are you using that bag?"
Me: "Yes. Why?"
Student: "I need a bag to put over my head during [my performance for] today's assembly."
(11/23/16)

Quote of the Day (telling)

Student: "Mister, do you tell your other students about the stupid stuff I do?"
Me: "Me? No. I would nev..."
Student: "Why not!? You should. It would be hilarious." (11/22/16)

Quote of the Day (congratulations)

A student begins suspiciously ogling a small container that someone gave to me earlier in the day. 

Student: "Are those...cookies?"

Me: "Yes. Why?"

Student: "Oh, nothing. I just wanted to congratulate you. That's all." (11/21/16)

Quote of the Day (Korean)

"Mister! You're Korean? What does 'it-g-ma' mean?" - Query from a (non-Asian) high school student who apparently has an entire K-Pop song (잊지마) memorized. (10/26/16)

Quote of the Day (basic)

"ARGH! I hate helping people who don't understand basic math!" - Complaint from a high school student who had gotten frustrated trying to help her friend during class. (11/17/16)

Quote of the Day (study)

Student: "Mister, was this test easier than the other ones?"
Me: "No."
Student: "Oh, then it must be because I studied for this one."
Me: *bites tongue*
(11/16/16)

Quote of the Day (slur)

"Mister, did you know there's a database for racial slurs online?" - Random question from a former student who also taught me that the school's network blocks urbandictionary.com. (11/15/16)

Quote of the Day (senior quote)

"Mister, I think I finally figured out what my senior quote is going to be." - Statement from a high school student who has been deliberating over his yearbook entry a little too much over the last few weeks. When I asked him what it was going to be he smiled and said, "The school's WiFi password is..." (11/14/16)

Quote of the Day (town)

Student: "Mister, did I ever ask you this?"
Me: "Ask me what?"
Student: "Did I ever ask you where you went to high school?"
Me: "I'm pretty sure you have."
Student: "You went to school in town, right?"
Me: "No."
Student: "Oh, that's right. You're not from around here are you."
(11/10/16)

Quote of the Day (money)

"No. You're wrong. I'm pretty sure you'd have less problems if you had more money." - Correction from a high school student who clearly did not get my hip hop reference during today's lesson about salaries. (11/9/16)

Quote of the Day (voting)

"Mister, why won't you tell me who you're voting for?" - Question from a high school student who just minutes earlier blasted me for giving my opinion that I thought his favorite movie was overrated after he had asked if I had seen it. (11/7/16)

Quote of the Day (snow)

"Is that snow?" - Question from a high school senior that elicited lots of eye rolls and groans from his peer after he saw this image of some nearby mountains on the projector. (11/4/16)

Quote of the Day (math teacher)

"Mister, [sister's name] says she might want to become a math teacher because of what you told her yesterday." - Secret(?) from a high school student a day after I had confessed to her sister that the subject I'm teaching is my weakest subject and that my struggles as a learner make me a more sympathetic teacher. We also talked about job security and loan forgiveness programs for math teachers because of a nationwide shortage. (11/3/16)

Quote of the Day (monkey 2)

"*sigh* Mister, I never said you were a monkey. I only meant you were sitting like a monkey." - Weak apology from a student after I teased her for saying that I looked like a monkey last week. (11/2/16)

Quote of the Day (monkey)

Student: "Mister, you just sitting there makes you look like one of those monkeys?"
Me: "What?!?!?"
Student: "You know, one of those monkeys. Hear no evil. See no evil. Speak no evil."
Me: "My hands are on my lap."
Student: "No. I didn't mean your face. I meant that your body looks like a monkey."

(10/28/16)