Wrong Number of the Day

"33" -- One student's response when asked how many points he scored on the homework. There were only 20 points possible.

Answer of the Day

"Too short." -- Same response heard from at least FOUR different teachers to my query of "How was your break?"

Comparison of the Day

"See? This is JUST like football." -- Co-teacher's comment to me about the Triangle Mid-Segment Theorem.

Student Quote of the Day

"Hey Mister, you have me back in your class again." -- One excited student's exclamation as he walked into class for a new semester.

Order of the Day

"Uh...Everything?" -- Neophyte's questionable response to the Subway worker's question of "What do you want on your sandwich?"

Jealous Quote of the Day

"Dooood, you're so wucky you have a towel." -- some sweaty little kid as I passed him and his family on the trail this morning.

Grandma's Joke of the Day

"Leave it for David." -- Gram's advice to leave the leftover chicken from her church's New Year's celebration (that I said was "all bone") for my brother who comes to visit tomorrow.

Quote of the Day

"I felt like scrubbing it for them." -- Grandma's comment on how dirty her hair dresser's toilet is.

Compliment of the Day

"I'm not complaining." -- Comment from grandma a couple days after I gave her the first gift in 3+ years that WASN'T a Long's gift card.

Missing Antecedent of the Day

"I opened the bathroom door to check if the light was still on, and I almost stepped on it." -- Grandma's retelling of what happened at her senior center today. So what was "it"? Luckily it was only someone's glasses.

Malapropism of the Day

"You just have to flow with the flow." -- An acquaintance's advice for when times get tough.

TMI of the Day

"Esau means 'the hairy one'. That's one of my favorite characters in the Bible, because I'm hairy." -- Overheard conversation at work.

Unanswerable Question of the Day

"Do you know if he'll stay late tomorrow after school?" -- Question asked to me by another faculty member in regards to the teacher I share rooms with. My stunned silence was my only possible answer to such an inane question. Am I my co-teacher's keeper?

Quote of the Day (Chatty Aunty Edition)

"I'm the same way too." -- A confession from the chattiest Aunty I know. (She'll go up to strangers in restaurants and ask them what it is they're eating, where they're from, if they come often, etc.) She said this quote to me after I explained that I'm not as outgoing as she thinks and that I'm usually quiet around people I've met for the first time.

Question of the Day

"Are you wearing red because it's the Christmas season?" -- question asked to me because I'm rarely seen wearing our school color.

Quote of the Day (Mtg. Edition)

"What's the over-under for how long she will be up there talking? Ten minutes?" -- A coworker's question to me to keep us entertained during yet another long-winded explanation in a faculty meeting. (I bet high and lost; in losing, we all actually won)

Observation of the Day

"He looks like he's really aged...Maybe he's tired." -- overheard at a faculty meeting. It was the first time to actually see and interact with some coworkers in almost four months.

Teacher Quote of the Day

"Whoa! What the heck am I doing?" -- Reaction from a teacher who absent-mindedly poured salad dressing instead of gravy on his meatballs.

Student Question of the Day

"Oh, that isn't your wife?" -- My student's response when he realized the he wasn't getting any answers to the questions he was asking me about another teacher on campus.

Mizpronunziation of the Day

Much to the chagrin of one of my students, Lacy, my co-worker continually mispronounced her name as "Lazy" for nearly three months. After correcting him privately, he is finally starting to get it. Today, however, some students were giggling incessantly. When I stopped to see why they were disrupting the class, I noticed that my co-worker was telling "Sack" to be quiet. "Sack" is another one of our students, Zack. :D