Quote of the Day (gram)

"Mister, did you make a 'gram'?" - Confusing question from a student just as class was starting. From a follow up conversation, I learned that she had stumbled upon the fake Instagram account I made in reaction to yesterday's social media post addressed to me by a former student. (9/30/16)

Quote of the Day (post)

"Hey Mister, did you see ******'s [social media] post?" - Question from a high school student as she walked into my class before school started. Several other students asked me similar questions throughout the day. Fortunately, the post was not slanderous but rather a photo that I had altered at the request of the student last school year replete with hashtags akin to #FavStudent. (9/29/16)

Quote of the Day (password)

"Mister, are you allowed to type the wifi password into our phones?" - Question from a high school student who clearly doesn't know two things: 1) internet security and 2) me. (9/28/16)

Quote of the Day (printing)

"Mister, could you print something for me?" - Question from a high school student that I've never met before. I assume he procrastinated something and needed it for the next period. (9/27/16)

Quote of the Day (assistant)

"She even brags about it in our other classes." - Comment from a high school student whose peer is apparently very proud that I said she was like my TA (Teacher's Aide) on the day that she finished her work early and was seen helping other students. (9/23/16)

Quote of the Day (lunch)

"Mister, you know that you eat lunch slowly, right?" - Question from a high school student who was observing me eat lunch after she had just interviewed me for her project during the scant 30 minutes I have for lunch in between classes. (9/23//16)

Quote of the Day (best)

"Mister, you know what's the best?" - Question from a former student who came back to visit. When I couldn't respond in a satisfactory manner, he flashed a newly minted driver's license and said, "Making solo runs to McDonald's. No more walking or asking people for a ride when I want to eat there." (9/22/16)

Quote of the Day (favorite)

"Mister, are we your favorite students?" - Question from one of two chatty students who were busy mocking each other instead of getting help on their assignments on the only day I was allowed to go home early. (9/21/16)

Quote of the Day (calling)

"Mister, I think I figured out what I want to do with my life." - Proud exclamation from a high school senior just as class was finishing. She gleefully continued, "I want to be a teacher. No, for real!" (9/20/16)

Quote of the Day (drugs)

"It wasn't because of drugs." - Comment from a smiling high school student who went well out of his way to clear the air after he had been mysteriously pulled out of class and called down to the office for the second week in a row. (9/19/16)

Quote of the Day (lines)

Me: "Bad estimations lead to things such as mismatched lane lines on the road like that bridge [near the school]."
Student: "What if you don't care about lines? I don't need any straight lines in the real world."
Me: "OK, I'll give you a hundred percent without the straight line."
Student: "...HEY!?!? That's not what I meant."
(9/16/16)

Quote of the Day (hyper)

"Mister, I don't know why I'm so hyper today." - Strange comment from a high school student who came into my class just to talk. He later admitted a potential cause of his strange behavior, "I think it's because I just found out that the girl that I like broke up with her boyfriend yesterday." (9/13/16)

Quote of the Day (alive)

Student 1: "Do you still keep in touch with Mr. [name of former coworker who moved to a different school]?"
Me: "Sometimes."
Student 2: "What!? He's still alive?"
(9/14/16)

Quote of the Day (lighter)

"Mister, can I borrow a lighter?" - Random question from a high school student in the middle of class. After I joked with him about the dangers of smoking at such an early age, he rummaged around his bag for the free bible that was given out by a religious group in front of the school this morning. "Mister, I don't smoke. I just wanted to burn this." (9/13/16)

Quote of the Day (plot)

"So if I touched some of [friend's name]'s peanuts then rubbed my fingers all over your water bottle, would you die?" - Question from a high school student after I had to refuse her friend's offering of some of her trail mix because of my peanut allergy. (9/12/16)

Quote of the Day (lunch)

"Mister, I've got to go eat school lunch today." - Statement from a student that temporarily confused me as he exited the class. I soon remembered that he was just acknowledging a long-running inside joke that started when I told him that a few years ago his older brother would stealthily eat his lunch during my class almost every day. (9/9/16)

Quote of the Day (eraser)

Student 1: "Where's my eraser!? Did you take it!?"
Student 2: "I never touched your eraser."
Student 1: "Give me back my eraser!"
Student 2: "I swear I never touched your eraser."
[a few minutes of arguing later]
Student 1: "There's my eraser!"
Me: "Where was it?"
Student 1: "I was sitting on it."
(8/5/16)

Quote of the Day (dirt)

"Mister, this is bothering me. Do you have a broom?" - Comment from a high school student who was annoyed that the floor around his desk was so dirty since it hadn't been swept in almost two weeks. (9/7/16)

Quote of the Day (perspective)

"It's so weird. I never thought of myself that way." - Confession from a high school student after I allowed him to read the letter of recommendation I wrote for him. (9/2/16)

Quote of the Day (cannibalism)

"Humans can taste good too...If you cook them right." - Random comment that I overheard during class right before lunch. (9/1/16)