Quote of the Day (old)

Student 1 [talking about her rugby scrimmage with a local team]: “They were all so old!”
Student 2: “Like grandmas!”
Student 1: “One of them had wrinkles all over.”
Me [worried about senior citizens playing a contact sport against teenagers]: “How old were they?”
Student 1: “20’s. Maybe in their 30’s.” (2/12/19)

Quote of the Day (quitting)

Student 1 walked up to me while I was helping another student, said something to me then returned to his seat.
Student 2 and Student 3 look at each other then look at me.
Student 2 [to me]: “Did you just hear that?”
Me: “Student 1, did you have something to ask me?”
Student 1 [playing dumb]: “Huh? What? I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Student 2: “You just called him Mr. Lau!”
Me: “That’s what I heard.”
Student 1 [to me]: “Mister, did you really hear me say that?”
Me: “Yes. Why did you not stay and ask your question?”
Student 1: “I just decided to quit while I was ahead.” (2/7/19)

Quote of the Day (help)

Student 1: “Mister, can you help me with my [math] homework?”
Me: “Sure.”
Student 1: “Oh wait, do you know how to do Algebra 2?”
Student 2: “He teaches higher math, I’m sure he knows how to teach Algebra 2.”
Student 1: “Yeah, but does he know how to do it?” (2/6/19)

Quote of the Day (test)

“That was a good unit.” - Comment from a high school student who had just scored above 90% on an exam for the first time all year. She added, “Can we just stay on this unit forever?” (2/5/19)

Quote of the Day (baby pictures)

“That was cool. It was like looking at baby pictures, but with math.” - Comment from a high school student after being given the chance to look through some of his old tests from last year. He remarked on how much he grew in knowledge since then and noticed trends in the types of things he struggled with as I prepared all of the old tests for disposal. (2/4/19)

Quote of the Day (D)

“Mister, I’ve never been happier to get a D on an exam until I took this class.” - Comment from an AP Calculus student after she learned that she passed the exam that had the lowest average score of all the exams that I gave last year. (2/1/19)

Quote of the Day (phone)

Student 1: “Mister, you have no idea how bad Student 2’s addiction to her cell phone is. [Teacher’s name] sent out three emails to our parents this semester. All of them were about us on our phones during class. All of them were because of Student 2.”
[a few hours later]
Student 2 [looking at something funny]: “Can someone take a picture of that? That’s so funny; I want a picture of it.”
Me: “Why don’t you take a picture of it yourself?”
Student 2: “I CAN’T! I had my phone taken away yesterday.” (1/31/19)

Quote of the Day (bronchitis)

Student 1 [announcing to me]: “I just want you to know that I have bronchitis.”
[a few days later]
Student 2 [looking a bit haggard]: “I don’t want to jinx myself, but I’m not feeling too good. I hope [Student 1] didn’t give me her bronchitis.”
Student 1: “You’re sick too? Now we’re bronchi-buddies!” (1/29/19)

Quote of the Day (TA)

Student 1: “How come I’ve never seen a T.A. (teacher’s aide) in this class (Trigonometry)?”
Me: “That’s because in order to help in a class like this, what class does the T.A. have to be in?”
Student 1: “Oh, a class higher than this one.”
Student 2: “Something like AP Trigonometry 5!” (1/29/19)

Quote of the Day (dumb)

Student: “Mister, do I look dumb?”
Me [thinking this was a trick question]: “No. Why would you even ask that?”
Student [attempting to discreetly point to her shaved eyebrow]: “No. Do you think THIS looks dumb?” (1/28/19)

Quote of the Day (workshop)

“What on earth could possibly be so important that they would make you miss our class?” - Question from a student after he found out I would be absent the next day for a mandatory workshop. (1/24/19)

Quote of the Day (shutdown)

Student 1 [entering a classroom darkened by a power outage]: “First the government shuts down, now the power is shut down.”
Student 2: “Next all our bodily functions will shut down.” (1/23/19)

Quote of the Day (slippers)

Student 1: “Mister, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you wear slippers.”
Student 2: “Yeah, how come you don’t wear slippers?”
Me: “I just think it looks unprofessional.”
Student 1: “So do you never wear slippers?”
(12/17/18)

Quote of the Day (square root)

“Mister! Don’t tell anyone that I just did that.” - Plea from a laughing student in an advanced math class. I had just caught her using the calculator to determine what the square root of one was. (1/18/19)

Quote of the Day (famous)

“That’s what I want to be when I grow up.” - Comment from a student after she told her friend that she wants to be famous. (1/16/19)

Quote of the Day (history)

Student 1: “Please let me just have this.”
Student 2: “No!”
Student 1: “Please! You know what? I’m just going to write this down: ‘January 15th...’”
Student 1: “Noooo!”
Me: “What’s going on?”
Student 2: “Student 1 is trying to say she’s smarter than me.”
Student 1 [who normally struggles in class]: “Just for today only. Please let me be smarter than you just for today.” (1/15/19)

Quote of the Day (drop)

Student: “Mister, did [student name] tell you she was dropping this class?”
Me: “No. She is?”
Student: “Yeah. Friday was her last day, but she made me promise not to tell you until after she was gone.” (1/14/19)

Quote of the Day (allergy)

Student [holding out an open package of cookies]: “Mister, do you want some nutter butters?”
Me: “No, thank you.”
Student: “Are you sure?”
Me: “Yes. I’m allergic to peanuts so I can’t have any.”
Student: “I’m allergic to math homework by the way.” (1/10/19)

Quote of the Day (exercise)

Student 1: “Aw man, it’s raining again. I hope that practice doesn’t get canceled.”
Me: “Practice? What kind of practice?”
Student 1: “Basketball. I need to practice so I can get better and so I can get my exercise.”
Student 2: “What a liar. Mister, every time I call him to go play ball he’s always like, ‘Nah, I’m playing Fortnite.’”
Student 1: “Hey, gotta exercise my thumbs too, you know?” (1/10/19)

Quote of the Day (poster)

Student [walking in with a rolled up poster]: “I have something for you.”
Me [absent mindedly thinking she was asking for permission to keep it in my classroom]: “Just put it there in the corner so no one will touch it. When are you going to pick it up?”
Student: “NO! It’s for your classroom!”
I turned to see a note that read, “For Mr. Hwang because I was bored over the break.” Unrolling the poster further revealed a painting of a hybrid animal that I immediately hung up. (1/9/19)